Amy Trosen: Two Sides of the Coin

Two Sides of the Coin

by Amy Trosen

I met an abused husband the other day. It was one of the saddest sights I have ever witnessed. No, his wife did not beat him with the frying pan, nor did she try to poison his food, She abused him nevertheless. How? By refusing to accord him the respect God says is his

due. She will tell anyone within hearing distance that her husband is useless,

selfish, unloving, and that she wants a divorce.

Do you know women like that? I encounter them often in my "Christian"

world, women who refuse to respect their husbands and who, without

conscience, heap abuse on them to anyone who will pause to listen. But my

husband doesn't love me, they say. He won't lift a finger to help me, they

whine.

There are two sides to this coin. True, the husband should love his wife

as Christ loves the church, but equally true is that the wife should respect her

husband. Do you respect your husband? Do you admire him in his areas of

strength and refuse to belittle him in his areas of weakness? Did you know

that men crave respect from their wives and that we have a duty before God to

admire them?

God showed me a few years ago that it is as hard for men to love their

wives as it is for women to respect their husbands. As women we tend to think of ourselves as lovable, but in marriage, frequently we are not. In fact, it is more likely that in a marriage, the wife is the abusive partner, not the husband. Oftentimes the reason a husband retreats to the safety of the couch and television or all-consuming hobbies is to avoid interaction with his wife that may invite acrimony, anger, discontent, and whining such as he never encounters out in the world. At work he is sought out and admired. At home he is shouted at and snubbed. Sisters in Christ, these things should not be! If we belong to Christ, we must treat our husbands as Christ treats us...with compassion. The wife is the helpmeet; she is not the Holy Spirit.

God hates divorce. It scares me when I encounter belligerent women who insist on their rights over their precious husband's feelings. A woman can make or break a man. So look for the good in your mate. Praise him in his areas of strength. Pray for him in his areas of weakness. Never, never allow anyone...not your mother, not your father, not your children, not your friends, not your co-workers, not his enemies to belittle him in your presence. He may know nothing else for sure but this one thing: My wife is on my side.

"The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil ALL THE DAYS OF HER LIFE." Proverbs 31:11-12

Sisters in Christ, let's purpose together to begin today to honor our husbands, to publicly admire his strengths, and to leave his weaknesses to God's correction.

For more devotional thoughts from this contributing writer, you can visit Amy Trosen's blog at: amytrosen.blogspot.com

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